After preparing themselves for the main course of a Test series, England usually treat ODIs as an unwanted dessert. One-day cricket has moved on but England are clearly stuck in treacle in terms of tactics. These are some of the things to spot should the wheels begin to fall off yet again...

Pietersen Opening Experiment
Oh yes, the "KP is going to open theory". Hasn't that one being tried before? Having got to a 50 against a mediocre Ireland in the World Cup, he then got bored and threw his wicket way. Then he got even more bored and went home with an injury. And who says spinners can't come on at the start of the innings to torment him further? That's exactly what South Africa did at Chennai in March when KP was dismissed in the first over by Robin Peterson.

Ravi Looks Good And Then Gets Out
Apparently, Ravi Bopara is looking good in the nets. It is almost certain then that he will go out to bat, score a nice looking 15 or twentysomething and miss a straight one for no good reason. That is what Bopara does. Perhaps he will even throw in a dropped catch and a few kamikaze run outs too. The Essex all-rounder may be handy with a bit of wobbly seam bowling but his added value is questionable.

Kieswetter - Boom Or Bust
Kieswetter is meant to be the power hitter that could change the way England approach the game. It is true he can hit a long ball, but his ability to hit the field means that too many dot balls and too much pressure builds up early on in the innings. There is something called subtlety and working the gaps.

Bresnan's Lump Of Coal
Tim Bresnan has many qualities but keeping Asian batsmen in check on their patch is not one of them. When the pitch isn't doing anything, the ball becomes like a piece of coal in Bresnan's hands. He went for a stack of runs in the ODI drubbing in India and surely he is best utilised in English-style conditions.

Batting Powerplay Leaves Wickets Tumbling
When the 50 over format requires England to be even less turgid and inflexible, they come horribly unstuck. In the 2011 World Cup, only Zimbabwe fared worse than England during the batting powerplay. While Pakistan's batting average was 52 at a run rate of just under 10, England's average was 13 at a rate of under 6.5. Their bowling average in the powerplays was 37, better than only Ireland, Kenya and Zimbabwe. The team clearly hasn't a clue how to mix common sense with innovation.

Dernbach's Mystery Slower Ball
Jade Dernbach has had some good moments as an international bowler, but he overdoes the slower ball to a huge extent. Dernbach's bowling average is over 40 and his economy rate is above six, which suggests that the Surrey man lacks the control to minimise the scoring areas of international batsmen.

Trott
Oh, yes. The Jonathan Trott debate will no doubt continue unabated when he scores 80 from 115 balls as England get beaten again. It will all be Trott's fault, you see. England could and surely would have done so much better at the World Cup without his 422 runs. Wouldn't they? In a lost world of reality, someone else (who?) would have scored these runs in double quick time. Trott's strike rate of 78 in the ODI game is the same as skipper Alastair Cook. They may finish top of the averages, but get the most blame if things go wrong.

Getting Bowled Out
At their very worst, England get bowled out within 50 overs. They are stuck in some time warp of ODI thinking, unable to decide whether to stick or twist. They've already got bowled out within 40 overs in the Test series, for goodness sake...

Tim Ellis